Change is inevitable, we all know that. Some change is expected, like starting a family or a new job, while others are more spontaneous and sometimes with a flair of exuberance or un-curtailed excitement, such as a chance meeting with someone who changes the course of your life, or perhaps your career, jettisoning you into a new position that you never even dreamed possible.
Changes for me, of late, have been plenty. Upheaval of my life on an Island that I truly adored, to return to the city to live with a new life partner. A change in job positions, within a new Health Authority, and a change from sleepy rural island life to the bustle of big city life.
Stress for me was at an all-time high: I cherish my roots planted deeply in the ground.. familiarity and stability are precious to me. I came away from all this change just two short months ago, with some new grey hairs, and a little more insight into the organic "me".. things that define the outer edges of my comfort zone, and things that I am not willing to settle less on, and areas that I'm willing to compromise in fairness, considering my own well being first and foremost.
Perhaps this is a place of contemplation or self-realization that comes with age. I also reached a milestone birthday this year, turning the big 5-0; I find myself spending more thought-time in making comparisons to the 'then and now" part of my thinking process. I am able to compare how I would have felt/reacted/made decisions on an older version (chronologically younger) of Me, and the part of Me today that has more wisdom-infused thoughts and demeanor.
Are we meant to get to a place where we psychologically recognize that we are aging gracefully? That we've likely begun to peak in our intellectual performances, and that we have learned some valuable life lessons along the way that continues to provide frameworks around much of how we handle things, such as change? Or are we meant to glide through life as we age, oblivious to the process, and then wake up one day in an extended care facility where we no longer remember anyone, but we have the tenacity to wonder what the hell happened to our lives?
Some key realizations have come to settle solidly in my mind: I know without a doubt the answer to a few of the questions I had about my life: I know what direction I want my career to go in; I know where I want to live and what my goals are for a home to call my own. I know that even these recent changes will change yet again, and that's okay. I know that by allowing the Universe to provide me with exactly what I need at the right time, that I will always be "okay'.
There comes great peace when you realize that you can just accept what life offers you, and eventually you will understand the reasons why things transpire as they do.
With this recent bout of changes, I've also come to appreciate the simplicity of my life. I have de-cluttered, de-materialized and downsized a tremendous amount, and with that, came a feeling of freedom and weightlessness that is extremely satisfying. Tied to this is a deep desire to have my own space honored and cherished.. a level of self-care that I've never really considered in the past.
I know what I want for the next 50 years of my life, and as long as the sun is in my eyes, and my feet planted firmly on the ground, anywhere that I am, I know that I can accomplish what I need and desire to do.
My wish is only to have my children meet the latter half of their lives with the same level of wisdom, or better.
Registered Psychiatric Nurse, Supportive Energy Therapy Practitioner, Yoga Instructor, Chartered Herbalist, AcuDetox Specialist, Personal Trainer, Entrepreneur, mom of three..
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